Being single is no longer widely seen as a temporary stage between relationships but increasingly as a distinct life phase. A new study by the University of Antwerp shows that only 1 in 8 singles aged 23–39 (12%) are actively looking for a long-term partner, even though many remain open to one.
The study is being presented next week, but De Standaard had already a look into the facts and figures.
The findings come from research conducted by the university’s Centre for Population, Family and Health, led by professor Dimitri Mortelmans. The study combined an online survey with in-person interviews among 6,391 participants. Around two-thirds lived alone, yet only 25% defined themselves as single and without a relationship.
Researchers describe today’s singles as a highly diverse group whose lifestyles no longer fit traditional categories.
Relationships beyond the traditional model
According to researcher Dries Van Gasse, the distinction between ‘single’ and ‘in a relationship’ has become increasingly blurred. Many young adults report forms of connection that fall outside traditional partnerships, such as ‘situationships’: intimate or exclusive relationships without formal commitment or long-term expectations.
These arrangements exist alongside other relationship forms that have become more visible in recent years, including open relationships, casual sexual partnerships, polyamory and ‘friends with benefits’. Researchers argue that these should no longer be regarded as marginal phenomena.
The study suggests that modern relationship patterns are more fluid, and that a permanent partnership is no longer universally seen as the ultimate life goal.
Only a minority actively searching
Despite the continued cultural ideal of finding a life partner, the survey found that only 12% of singles are actively searching for one.
The gender difference is notable:
However, many more singles say they would welcome a relationship if the circumstances were right.
Van Gasse emphasises that forming a relationship depends on more than desire alone. Researchers argue that three conditions must align: individuals must be willing, ready, and able to form a relationship. If one of these elements is missing, for example because of life priorities or limited opportunities to meet potential partners, relationships may not develop.
Why people remain single
The study also asked respondents why they were single. The most common explanation was simply not having met the right person.
Key reasons cited include:
- Have not found the right person: 79%.
- Want to remain free and independent: 52%.
- Fear of being hurt: 51%.
- Not good at dating: 51%.
- Too selective about partners: 48%.
- Negative past experiences in relationships: 34%.
- Lack of time to date: 29%.
- Perception that no one is interested: 29%.
- Recent relationship break-up: 18%.
- Health problems: 13%.
- Risk of losing social benefits: 2%.
- Partner recently deceased: 1%
Researchers note that these responses illustrate how singlehood often results from a combination of personal circumstances, past experiences and structural factors rather than a deliberate rejection of relationships.
More single men than women
Contrary to common stereotypes, the research shows that men are more often single than women across all age groups between 23 and 39.
Researcher Laura Robberecht explains that this partly reflects typical dating patterns: women tend to partner with slightly older men, leaving a higher proportion of men without partners in younger age cohorts.
Another stereotype also proves inaccurate: that men enjoy single life more than women. The survey found that single women report higher life satisfaction than single men.
Overall satisfaction among singles averaged 7 out of 10. People who are actively searching for a partner, or who feel social pressure to find one, report lower satisfaction levels.
Dating apps widely used but not decisive
Digital platforms play a central role in contemporary dating. The study found that 88% of singles have experience with dating apps.
Researcher Elise ’t Hoen notes that women actually use these apps slightly more often than men and are also more likely to attend organised dating events such as speed-dating.
However, the research highlights a paradox: while many singles search for partners online, most relationships still begin offline. People most often meet partners through mutual friends, work, school or social activities.
Social pressure and changing expectations
Social expectations around relationships remain strong, particularly among younger adults. More than one-third of singles in their twenties report feeling pressure from family or friends to find a partner, especially during family gatherings.
This pressure decreases with age. After 35, only 20% still report experiencing such expectations. The research also indicates that highly educated women experience the strongest social pressure to form a partnership or start a family.
A minority identify as ‘happy singles’
Although independence is widely valued, only a minority of respondents describe themselves as completely satisfied with single life. Even among those who consider themselves ‘happy singles’, most do not report total contentment.
Researchers conclude that the experience of being single has become more complex and varied. Rather than a temporary waiting room before partnership, singlehood has increasingly become a normal and multifaceted way of life.
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